In this final interview of our series (appropriately timed towards Valentine’s Day), we will visit with Nancy Murdoch, the author of
It’s Mostly About Sex…And the Pleasures of Pleasing a Woman. 
For typical non-fiction books like my own, there isn’t generally an issue with marketing; most avenues are open to me with little restriction. But for Nancy Murdoch, many doors slam on her in her attempts to promote her new book. Why? It’s all about “sex.”
In this interview I will talk with Nancy and see how she is able, or not, to overcome these obstacles and the stigma that comes along with “sex.”
Carol Denbow: Welcome Nancy. Let’s start with you telling us a little about your book.
Nancy Murdoch: Okay Carol. Married, single, divorced, dating or in a committed relationship …LOVE is everything, and without it we cease to thrive and flourish in all areas of our lives because life is about relationships. We are in relationship with family, friends, co-workers, our environment, the air we breathe and even the food we eat. But few people can honestly say they are truly happy in their love relationships.
Many men have come to me feeling empty, brokenhearted and disillusioned searching for the secrets to connecting intimately with that one special woman. And even more men want to know how to lavish a woman with the selfless giving of pleasure. So I wrote this book to help all men become more self-empowered so they can engage in healthy, loving relationships with everyone, including a significant romantic partner.
It’s Mostly About Sex…And the Pleasures of Pleasing a Woman gets down to the nitty gritty of why men are attracting women they don’t want to be with in relationships and are repelling the women with whom they are interested. I use many real-life stories throughout the book in order to provide readers with clear examples of how to shift the energy that draws them into painfully unhealthy relationships, and change it into a natural, radiant sex appeal that women can’t say “no” to.
But I’m going to warn you right now that if you have an ego you may feel a sting. There is no ego in love and this book intentionally strikes at the core of what drives men because I want you to succeed. I truly believe in love and happy-ever-after relationships.
Carol Denbow: Although your book is non-fiction self-help, it also falls into the erotica genre. Some advertisers, reviewers, etc. still see this as taboo. Has this posed problems with your efforts to market and promote your book?
Nancy Murdoch: I was actually dumbfounded to learn that my book was judged by some reviewers and advertisers without them even reading the first page! Every time someone said, “Sorry, we don’t deal with that type of book.” I felt I was back in the days when they hanged “witches” or burned women at the stake because these women had knowledge to help people heal that was feared by those in authority. Each time I’m perceived as a threat to someone’s antiquated belief system, I’m shocked. But then again, I’ve known for many years that I’m a catalyst to individual and mass transformation and “change” isn’t always comfortable for those who need to do the changing. When people attempt to avoid change the most popular path of resistance is to shoot the messenger – or ban, burn and ignore the book, the message or the messenger.
Challenges are merely opportunities in disguise. Thus, I do not look at this “taboo” as a marketing problem, but rather an unexpected edge I have over other books that are playing it safe. I never play it safe; I always play it real and give everything I’ve got to help people find lasting happiness in love and life. If this means bringing sexual energy, porn, prostitution, intimacy and love to the table, then I’m going to dish it out in heaping portions. There is already an inherently strong opinion about my subject matter which can play in my favor. Strong opinions attract equally strong contrasting points of view which creates a virtual breeding ground for controversy, discussions and media attention. This book has the power to generate enough attention to help humanity as a whole start to lessen the gap between men and women and begin to truly love one another. Whether this happens or not is up to the readers.
There is nothing erotic about my book - not even the cover. The image on the cover is a charcoal drawing I did about 20 years ago in university when I was going through the Fine Arts Program. It was my first ever drawing class and I was so thrilled to get my drawing to look like the live model and not some weirdly contorted monster from Planet Distortion. So I definitely view this cover as fine art, not erotica. I’ve even got the degree to prove it. A woman’s body has beautiful shapes, contours, colors and textures that are as much a part of nature as are the flowers, oceans, sky and earth. That’s why I love drawing, painting and sculpting the female figure. Tell me the last time you saw a lioness hide her naked body in modesty or shame? Why should men and women feel demoralized by the image of a nude human body whether it’s on the cover of a book or standing on the beach in front of you?
So, if love, happiness, deep intimacy, caring, sharing, selflessness and self-understanding are considered erotica, then get out the X-Rated stamp because this book is loaded from cover to cover.
Carol Denbow: What have you found to be the most effective ways to market your book?
Nancy Murdoch: Marketing has been my greatest challenge. I want someone else to do it for me so I can get back to doing what I am most passionate about and what I do best – writing more books and creating art. But what author can afford that, right? I have 5 books in various stages of completion and 3 bodies of art work waiting impatiently for me to stop marketing and start manifesting again. Contrary to what unknown authors are taught by seasoned authors who have been around the publishing block a few times, I KNOW I’m not meant to do my own marketing. But my mystery marketer hasn’t shown up yet. So, I’m going to market by intuition; which basically means getting out of my own way in order to allow space for the “real” marketer (a complement to the gifts I’ve got to throw into the mix) to enter the scene.
I’m also setting intentions for how I want this to play out and shifting my beliefs to be in alignment with my intentions. In other words, I’m creating my own success story. Time will tell if my methods are working or not. Meanwhile, I am continuing to take heart-inspired actions, which could mean sending a few paperback copies to newspapers and magazines, renting a booth at a mind/body/spirit show or setting up a virtual book tour. It’s too early in the game to decide what’s effective and what isn’t.
Carol Denbow: I’m curious; do you have more book orders or inquiries from men or women?
Nancy Murdoch: Men. But I’m sensing that women may be the ones who initially read the book then gift it to their boyfriends, husbands, brothers and sons . . . and even to their girlfriends to pass on to their men. The general consensus is that men prefer to watch and listen rather than read a book. So, I created an audio MP3 version men can listen to on their compute to and from work.
Carol Denbow: Okay, you’re here, right now, with a book that’s difficult to market. Show us how this is done. Valentine’s Day is approaching; sell us on your book!
Nancy Murdoch: There are books you read....and then there are books that change your life. This book holds all the secrets to attracting a quality woman and maintaining a healthy, happy, growthful relationship that can span the test of time. Secrets that are relevant to every man's life regardless of age, size, relationship status or profession, while challenging a man to be the best he can be.
Valentine’s Day is fast approaching, and for many people it’s THE most depressing day of the year. But whether you are single, married, dating or somewhere in between, every day can be a day of joy and love that lasts an entire lifetime – with or without a partner in your life!
And, to make it super easy I’ve put together a power-packed Valentine’s Day Special that includes the PDF book, It’s Mostly About Sex…And the Pleasures of Pleasing a Woman, 140 minute Audio Book MP3, 2 - 30 minute Magical Love Meditations For Men MP3s and a Relationships Survival Guide PDF. I can’t guarantee you’ll find love by Valentine’s Day . . . but I guarantee that this package will be the best kick-start a man will ever need to become a better lover.
Carol Denbow: Alright authors, there’s your tip for the day! Nancy, where can we learn more about this juicy new book of yours? Website? Blog?
Nancy Murdoch: Additional information can be found at
http://itsmostlyaboutsex.com. And, until February 14th I’ll be posting strategies to improve confidence and increase self-esteem on my blog
http://nancy-lovesangel.blogspot.com so everyone can be revved up and ready for luv. For articles on self-awareness, life purpose, health and inspiration, please check out
http://loves-angel.com.
Carol Denbow: Thank you Nancy for sharing the in’s and out’s of book promotion for sensitive issued books!
